THE BETA AND I

My heart shattered into a thousand pieces at the sight in front of me. I had no idea that this kind of pain existed until tonight.

The day I’d been dreading finally came — the day that he would find his fated mate. And it was not me.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

A YEAR AGO.

CATHERINE.

I couldn’t sleep. That was nothing new. I usually stay up late to watch movies or read books. But tonight, I was laying in bed and staring at the ceiling, waiting for my brother, Jace, and his Beta, Tyler, to come home, like I always do whenever they attend galas where many Alpha Females will be in attendance.

I wanted assurance that Tyler would come home mateless.

Yes, I’d been crushing on my brother’s Beta since I became aware of the word "mates." 

Tyler and I grew up together. And everyone around us thought we would end up together as fated mates. My birthday will be in two months. Something I had always looked forward to. I couldn’t wait to see if I would get mated with Tyler.

I’d been praying for it for a long time, and like Mom always said, the Goddess listens to our heart’s deepest desires. So all this time, I was keeping my hopes high.

My body stirred awake at the sound of an approaching car. I had no idea that I had fallen asleep. It was a good thing that I left the window open so I could hear them.

I shoved my blanket off my body and rose to my feet before rushing to the window. That was Jace’s car, and another one was behind his. 

They were back, but my room was in a position where I couldn’t see them perfectly.

I rushed and slipped on my sneakers before taking one last look at myself in my vanity mirror, then dashed to the door and to the big window along the corridor.

The view of the packhouse ground was not that clear from the fourth floor with the absence of lights and many trees surrounding it, but I was able to see a female stepping out of the second car. 

I squinted my eyes for a better look, but before I could see any male beside her, the Gamma’s gaze went up to where I was, and I immediately hid myself.

I walked away from the window and instead went to the stairs. I wanted to know who she was. I was sure she was not Jace’s mate because if she were, she would be sitting in his car, not in the convoy.

My heart clenched in pain, knowing she could be Tyler’s mate. Or the warriors with them.

Please, Goddess, let it be the latter.

I tried to control the beating of my heart as I walked down the stairs, but my body was a traitor. Instead, it thumped so hard that it seemed like it would jump out of my chest. 

And then I heard voices. It only meant they were inside the house already.

I was walking down the last flight of stairs when they all came into view, and it made me stop from taking another step.

My heart shattered into a thousand pieces at the sight in front of me. I had no idea that this kind of pain existed until tonight.

My brother’s Beta, the man of my dreams, the only man I ever paid attention to, was holding a female in his arms. 

My eyes darted to her neck, and seeing the fresh mark of a fated mate had shot daggers right into the depths of my soul, as if my heart being broken was not enough. The pain kept coming as if it needed to crush what was left of my sanity.

The Goddess didn’t favor me this time. The Goddess chose her over me.

The air stilled as a smile slowly curled onto my lips as I walked down the remainder of the stairs and stopped in front of them.

The female smiled at me as if she hadn’t taken away the only person who was keeping my heart beating.

She laid out a hand before she introduced herself. "Hi, my name is Zoey. I’m Beta Tyler’s mate."

Tyler’s mate. 

I already knew it when I saw her mark, but hearing it was still equally painful. 

I should hate her. I should have walked away because she stole the title I had dreamed of having from the very beginning.

Tyler was supposed to be my mate.

Mine.

I took her hand and shook it, the smile still on my face, and for some reason, the tears that I thought would come didn’t.

"I’m pleased to meet you, Zoey. I’m Catherine. Alpha Jace’s sister." I wanted to pat myself on the back for the strength in my voice when everything inside me was crumbling. 

I immediately withdrew my hand and placed it on my back, so she wouldn’t see that my hands had begun to tremble.

"I’m glad there’s another female around here. As Tyler told me, the Alpha and Gamma are not mated yet." She smiled before she gazed lovingly at Tyler.

"Yes..." I had no idea what to say anymore. "Welcome to the family." 

I let my eyes stay on her face because I knew if I looked at Tyler or my brother, I would end up crying.

But I was putting my big girl pants on as I kept all the pain inside my heart and welcomed Tyler’s mate into my arms when she offered a hug.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath.

The Beta is not mine. 

He was never mine in the first place. 

"Why are you still awake?" Tyler’s deep baritone voice rattled my whole being, making my knees weak. I always gave the same answer when he asked me this. I would tell him, of course, that I was waiting for him to come home. But I couldn’t say that anymore. 

My eyes darted to Austin as I withdrew from hugging Zoey. 

“I thought I’d talk with Austin about my schedule tomorrow.” I finally answered without taking my eyes off my cousin, who was also my brother’s Gamma.

"Oh, so you and Austin?" Zoey said, her voice sounding so happy.

"No way," Austin chuckled before he moved beside me and placed an arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his side. "This girl here is my favorite cousin."

"Oh, sorry…" She smiled sheepishly, and I was still trying to find something to hate about her, but I couldn’t. 

But I knew I still hated her. 

"I think we should call it a night." My brother finally spoke. "We can talk about everything tomorrow."

"Thank you, Alpha. I’m tired too, so I just want to rest." Zoey stated.

Of course, she wanted time with him. Alone.

I waited for Austin to say his usual spiel about fucking or sex, as he would in instances similar to this, but it never came. 

Was he feeling my pain too?

Zoey and Tyler excused themselves, and I just nodded my head, smiling at Zoey but refusing to look at Tyler until they were out of my sight. 

I saw Jace and Austin follow their movement up the stairs, and when the footsteps were not that loud anymore, they moved their gazes back at me.

Jace’s eyes softened, as did Austin’s.

I raised my hand and pointed a finger, shaking it as tears filled my eyes. "I’m okay, don’t say anything."

But the tears I was trying to stop still fell from my eyes when my brother’s arms wrapped around me, pulling me into his chest. 

I finally let out the cry I was trying to fight off as I gripped his shirt tightly.

No one said a word, but I could see Austin looking at us, his hand on his waist as he brushed his hair with his other hand, and the pain was evident on his face.

I closed my eyes as Jace pressed a kiss on my hair. 

"You will be fine, Catherine. Tell me what I can do to help." Jace’s voice broke. He was always tough, and his voice never faltered in my presence until tonight.

"I don’t know." I kept swiping my eyes with my hands, but the tears came anyway. "I just want the pain to stop."